O.G Slenderman

Quiet and Composed

Shit Talker level 0.25/10

The Reason Warren has McDavid

Con Artist 

Gentle Lover

Has Jerked it to Charlie Conway

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Doesnt like Hockey, only Gambling

Owner of the Sandpaper Dildo

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Favourite Flavour Crayon is Blue

The Boy You Bring Home to Mama

Safe to Trade Blackhawks

Too nice to make fun of

Bald But Beautiful

Gem of a Human

Ask Forgiveness, Not Permission

Left Alberta to Search for Dick

Splashes Balls When he Pees

The Fantasy Maple Leafs

Gambling > Responsibility

Hides bad Players like Anne Frank

Off to Sleep with Your Mom

Will Do Gay Shit for Oilers

Safety... Always Off

#1 Fantasy College Hockey Owner

Drinks Bong Water

Has a PornHub Profile

Owns a phone

Plays Axis and Allies

Probably has other Friends

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Perpetual 5 year plan.

Hates Beers When Friends Come to Visit

Pretends to hate the Sandpaper Dildo

Is Like.... Really Busy Right Now.

Really Misses Lucic as an Oiler

Fights Coke Heads

Currently serving 3 to 5 for Trade Rape

Addicted to Twitter

Owns a 15th overall Waiver AND a 71rst overall Draft pick

Shit Talker Level 11.5/10

Wildcard as big as his penis.