O.G Slenderman

Quiet and Composed

Shit Talker level 0.25/10

The Reason Warren has McDavid

Con Artist 

Gentle Lover

Has Jerked it to Charlie Conway

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Doesnt like Hockey, only Gambling

Owner of the Sandpaper Dildo

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Favourite Flavour Crayon is Blue

The Boy You Bring Home to Mama

Safe to Trade Blackhawks

Too nice to make fun of

Bald But Beautiful

Gem of a Human

Ask Forgiveness, Not Permission

Left Alberta to Search for Dick

Splashes Balls When he Pees

The Fantasy Maple Leafs

Gambling > Responsibility

Hides bad Players like Anne Frank

Off to Sleep with Your Mom

Will Do Gay Shit for Oilers

Safety... Always Off

#1 Fantasy College Hockey Owner

Drinks Bong Water

Has a PornHub Profile

Owns a phone

Plays Axis and Allies

Probably has other Friends

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Perpetual 5 year plan.

Hates Beers When Friends Come to Visit

Pretends to hate the Sandpaper Dildo

The Sugar Bear and the Never There

Most fun you can have with a Text message

​No matter what, better than Mac.

Addicted to Twitter

Owns a 15th overall Waiver AND a 71rst overall Draft pick

Shit Talker Level 11.5/10

Wildcard as big as his penis.